Sunday, July 21, 2013

ONLY GOD FORGIVES :: A REVIEW

You will hate this movie
because it moves at such a slow pace.

You will hate this movie
because violence comes out of nowhere and hardly add anything.

You will hate this movie
because hardly anyone speaks, and when they do it's rarely meaningful.

You will hate this movie
because it's not the followup to Drive you wanted.

You will hate this movie
because scenes are cut in such a way that doesn't match up.

You will hate this movie
because you'll be screaming at the characters to just fucking emote!

You will hate this movie
because the few times they do emote are so laughably contrived, out of place and silly.

You will hate this movie
because the 90 minute run time will feel like 90 hours.

You will hate this movie
because the ending doesn't make sense.

You will hate this movie
because it is one of the year's best films.

Tuesday, July 9, 2013